COLLEGE OF THE ROAD: Carnal Man vs. Earnest Examination O. Self

Earnest Examination O. Self
Was Expelled From Carnal Man's Class!

It Happened This Way ...

Carnal Man Is A Tenured Professor At

This IS The Way

College Of The Road

- Growing Up Campus -

On The First Full Day Of Classes
By Way Of Challenge
AND
To Pay Off A Debt To No-Ah DeFlood
Professor Man Had Given A Semester-Long Assignment 

To Read King James' Psalms
Take A Position
AND
Defend It ... To The Death!

Long Story Short ...

He Had Effectively
AND
With Seeming Efficiency
Opened
The Can Of Warfare!

This is A Lil' Background ...

Earnest Examination O. Self
Had Previously Lovingly Enjoyed
The Pleasures Of Sin
BUT
The Season Of Sinful Enjoyment
Did Not Last
OR
At Least It Did
UNTIL
His Lot
Upon The Deliverer
He Had Cast!

Being A Willing And Disciplined Student

He Had Started At The Beginning Of The Psalms

AND

Had Quickly Found ... Wisdom:

BLESSED Is The Man That Delights

In The Law! 

Whatsoever He Doeth Shall Prosper! 

Thou Art My Son! 

Be Wise Now!

Salvation Belongeth Unto The Lord!

Stand In Awe And Sin Not!

Transfixed By Truth
He Said In His Heart:

Lead Me, Lord, In Thy Righteousness!

Have Mercy On Me For I Am Weak!

But, Then, He Considered The Statement ...

God Is Angry With The Wicked Every Day!

... And Thought It Reasonable

To Pose A Direct Question To Almighty God:

What Is Man That Thou Art Mindful Of Him?!

With His Soul Satisfied With Truth's Plain Response

He Shouted:

I Will Praise Thee, O Lord, With My Whole Heart!

When He Went To Bed That Night
The Song In His Heart Was:

The Lord Is King For Ever And Ever!

In The Middle Of His First Class The Next Morning
He Was Given No Other Choice But To Ask Carnal Man:

If The Foundations Be Destroyed

What Can The Righteous Do?!

Not Long Thereafter
Things Got Acid Real Fast
AND
Carnal Man Roared At Him
Saying:

Our Lips Are Our Own!

Who Is Lord Over Us?!

After Taking A Thorough Beating At School That Day
AND

Becoming Very Discouraged
He Went To Bed Praying That Night:

Consider And Hear Me, O LORD My God:

Lighten Mine Eyes

Lest I Sleep The Sleep Of Death!

Before He Closed His Eyes
To Rest In Sleep
He Wrote On His Notepad:

The Fool Hath Said In His Heart

There Is No God!!!!!

He Awakened The Next Morning
Totally Refreshed
AND
Wrote A Whole Chapter About

He Wrote For Its Conclusion:

I Will Bless The Lord

Who Hath Given Me Counsel! 

Hold Up My Goings In Thy Paths

That My Footsteps Slip Not! 

Hide Me Under The Shadow Of Thy Wings!

The Semester Was All Of Three Weeks

Three Days

Three Hours And Fifty-Four Minutes Old

When Hellen Damnation Showed Up ... UNANNOUNCED!

Before Long
It Became Very Apparent
To All Persons Present That
A Certain Somebody Was Going To Have Their Guts
Turned To Garters
All Because Of ...!

Well ... 

Earnest Had Brought The Lord To Class
- For Real -
AND
When He Was Forcefully Challenged
- In His Newly Acquired Faith -
He Had Boldly Stated:

I Will Call Upon The LORD

Who Is Worthy To Be Praised:

So Shall I Be Saved From Mine Enemies!

Just So You Know ...

In That Very Instant
De Big Dog Up And Dead!

Hellen Damnation Totally Lost Her Tiny Mind
AND
Professor Carnal Man Got On Like A Pop Kite
In A Fierce Easter-Holiday Wind
AND
Bedlam And Ruckus
Elegantly Came Out Of Darkman Closet!

When The Commotion Was Finally

Administratively
Concluded
Earnest Examination O. Self
Was Summarily Expelled From Carnal Man's Class
For. Cause!

If You Had Seen His Departure
You Would Have Been Mommy-Daddy-Proud ...

He Left With His Head Raised
His Shoulders Squared
His Back Ramrod Straight
His Faith Strong
His Hope For Heaven High
His Comforter In His Heart
His Very Best Friend Beside Him
His Angel Watching Over Him
AND
Confident
That His God
His Personal Savior
His King
His Redeemer
AND
His Present Help
The God Of Creation
IS
Esconced On Heaven's Glorious Throne!

These Were His Final Words
Before The Witnesses:

The LORD Is My Rock

And My Fortress

And My Deliverer; 

My God

My Strength

In Whom I Will Trust;

My Buckler

And The Horn Of My Salvation

And My High Tower!

I Shall Not Be Moved!

His Soon-To-Be-Former Classmates
Stood Up
AND
Cheered
BUT
Carnal Man
- Forgetting Where He Was -
Vividly Swore!

From That Day Forward
Earnest Examination O. Self
Earnestly Chose To Unashamedly Trust God
AND
Went After Sin No More!

For The Record ...

The Master
- Our Coming King -
Is Well Pleased!
His Soul Is Satisfied
AND
There Is Rejoicing Up In Heaven
For The Lost One Returned To The Safe Fold!

As For Carnal Man
AND
Hellen Damnation
It Was Revealed
- Publicly Revealed -
That They Were Involved
In An Extracurricular Activity
Or More Particularly
Intimately Involved
In An Affaire De Coeur!

When All The Dirty Linen Was
Thoroughly Aired
It Revealed Something Long Suspected
BUT
Never Vocally Identified:

Carnal Man
Carnal Professor Man
Is A Hit Man For The Goat Clan
AND
Specifically
The Goat-Herder Himself
God Wannabe!

When, Eventually
Earnest Examination O. Self Received The Polo
Declaring The News

He Replied:

Saved By Grace!

Saved By Grace! 

Thank God Almighty

I Was

I Am

Saved By Grace!

Earnest Examination O. Self

To This Very Day

Glorifies Almighty God
AND
Gives Jesus Christ
Total Praise!